Bring Me All The Pitchers

The most pivotal offseason of Chaim Bloom’s career started this week, and I would like him to sign all the pitchers.

Right now the Sox’s rotation heading into next year is Chris Sale, Nick Pivetta and Brayan Bello, and that’s not enough big-time pitchers. Innings demand to be eaten, and Bloom has typically approached this problem by signing many cheap pitchers, and hoping two or three pan out. Obviously I suspect he will do so again but what I’m suggesting is he also sign some more expensive ones — all of the pitchers, basically.

I do not actually want nine starters on the team but I want them in on everyone. Ultimately, I want Carlos Rodón on the Red Sox like I want to win the Powerball, or like I would if I bought a ticket. Chris Bassitt? I would also like him to be signed to the active roster of the Boston Red Sox. Charlie Morton? Please also become employed at Fenway Park, as a pitcher.

The only pitcher I do not want the Red Sox to sign is Jacob deGrom, who is the best one but is hurt a lot and going to cost far too much money, but ultimately it would be okay if they signed him, though they won’t.

This just just one side of the ball, and while I suppose the Sox need some hitters as well in addition to Xander Bogearts, who they should obviously re-sign, and Rafael Devers, who they should extend, this post is primarily about my desire for Bloom to sign a lot of pitchers. I feel the point has been made by now, but if not: Bring me the pitchers!