Red Sox at Mets lineup: A hapless team against the best pitcher in baseball... what could go wrong?

Road, sweet road? Ha! Yes, the Sox leave the unfriendly confines of Fenway Park for the first time this year, and their reward is a date with the best pitcher in baseball. Jacob deGrom, and his extremely Pedro-like arsenal, will present another seemingly insurmountable challenge for the Sox tonight (7:10 p.m.).

On the bright side, the Sox counter with their own “Cy Young candidate,” Nathan Eovaldi, which I put in quotes because I made it up. Certainly he’s the best pitcher on the Sox right now by about a hundred miles, but deGrom he’s not. So I think the Sox should try to abscond with deGrom somehow rather than truly try to win these games because big picture, you know? I have no idea how they’d do this, but if Chaim Bloom is as smart as I’ve heard he can figure it out. My advice: mirrors.

Anyhow I joke because this is all miserable and doesn’t figure to improve until at least tomorrow. Speaking of, Andrew Benintendi is back in the leadoff spot for now, while Xander Boagerts gets an off day. It’s his second in less than a week but with deGrom on the mound it seems sort of academic and I know, I know: you can’t predict baseball. Maybe the Sox will pull a fast one. Yeah maybe. I’ll short that bet.