Friday Red Sox Lineup: The Hitchhiker's Guide To A Bad Team

Douglas Adams once wrote "It can hardly be a coincidence that no language on Earth has ever produced the phrase, 'as pretty as an airport.' "

It's not exactly surprising that no language has ever produced the phrase 'as pretty as a September 2012 Red Sox lineup' because that's a terribly specific thing and really there's not many languages with significant enough exposure to the Red Sox that it could even be expected of them.

But even if every last permanent settlement on Earth consisting of five-or-more people were given their very own copy of the Red Sox as they are now, playing an infinite number of baseball games over an infinite number of September 2012 days, that phrase would still go unminted.

Unless, of course, someone was being quite sarcastic indeed.

All this is to say that the Red Sox have not somehow found a way to make their lineup look any better than usual today.