We're here live (see: not there, not live) at Arlington for the World Heat Stroke Championships!
The men gathered here today have made it through two brutal preliminary round of hot, hot, and more hot, and will now try there hands at the HOTTEST!
OK, so actually it's a bit cooler than the last couple of games at 97 degrees, but yowza, can we get out of there before Lowrie shrivels up like a raisin?
The final game belongs to Daisuke Matsuzaka and C.J. Wilson.
I hear Daisuke plans to debut his new "Rising Sun" ball, where he holds the ball up in the air until it bursts into flames, and ten tosses it submarine style at the opponent's head. So that should be cool.
Well if that's not about the saddest lineup I done seen in a long time. At least the Rangers are down Cruz and Vlad "Infield Single" Guerrero.