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Brad Penny Signs With Cardinals

Brad Penny has a new baseball team to blow up for pitch for (that would be the St. Louis Cardinals). Not only that, but he's getting paid a lot of money, too:

The Cardinals and Brad Penny have a letter of agreement, for a $7.5 million base and $1.5 in performances bonuses. Physical likely on Wed.

Are you kiddiiiiiiing me? Penny received a $5M base from the Red Sox when he was signed last offseason. I don't care what he did with the Giants -- He. Should. Not. Get. A. Raise.

Penny sticking in the National League? Story definitely checks out.

(NOTE: I am going to just ignore the fact he was pretty good with the Giants. Completely ignored.)