Trading for Mike Trout

Kelvin Kuo-USA TODAY Sports

All we want for Christmas is Mike Trout under the tree. Please do not forget the air holes.

I know that this article says it's written by the lovely and talented Bryan Joiner, but it's not. At least, not yet. For now, you're stuck with me, Marc Normandin, with Bryan coming along a little later. I'm here to explain why you just saw what you did and clicked on it.

It's Christmas season, meaning it's time to give gifts. What do you get for the team that has everything, though? Seriously, what do you buy for the Red Sox: they're overflowing with prospects and the roster is full and they just won the World Series. Oh, we know! How about we figure out a scenario in which the Sox could trade for baseball's best player, Mike Trout?

20130801_ads_bs5_029This guy. (Photo credit: Benny Sieu-USA TODAY Sports)

Sure, Trout isn't on the trade market, but we can envision a scenario where it could happen. A Christmas miracle, if you will. Let's say Trout knows he could make, oh, I don't know, $400 million on the free agent market should he wait that long. That moment is a long time from now, though, and Trout, who is teammates with Albert Pujols and Josh Hamilton, realizes that a whole lot can go wrong at any time, regardless of your innate talent. So, he wants an extension, and he wants it right now, for somewhere between $250-$300 million for 10 years. The Angels, thanks to the aforementioned albatrosses and not actually being in the Los Angeles market, cannot give him this, so Trout is on the market, with the idea being he will go to a team that has the prospects and the financial backing to secure him through what should be his legendary years.

We're assuming for our purposes that the Red Sox will make the money work even if they pay Trout $30 million per year -- he's Mike Trout, and there's no reason in having him if you aren't going to build around him. One major hurdle remains, though, and that's satisfying the Angels in a trade. For that, I'll turn things over to Bryan below. And Matthew Kory, and Ben Buchanan, and Matt Collins, and lone1c.

I'm not sure if the Angels will go for Joiner's offer, but I have to say, the accoutrements are certainly unique. The rest of the bunch are far lengthier with their explanations, so if you're looking for some meat to satisfy your hunger for baseball over Christmas, we have that, too. Consider this introduction your appetizer.

-Marc Normandin

Star-divide

1. Xander Bogaerts. It has been theorized that one could make a Trout offer without him, but everyone who has tried has gone mad.

2. Felix Doubront. Solid No. 3 starter, something the Angels do not have.

3. Choice of any two other prospects (must be at different positions). The first the Angels get automatically; the second, we can negotiate.

4. Jenny Dell. Trouble in paradise. Better than inevitably following Will Middlebrooks to Japan.

5. Nantucket.

6. Two beers from Fenway. (Time saved: two weeks and two hours. Two weeks waiting for a MA license, two hours in line.)

7. An extremely versatile paper bag. (Must accept the Matthew Kory inside.)

Read more Red Sox:

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