BZ's BiZarre Rankings
Bored at work (pre-finals week and all of my seniors are gone) so I thought I'd have fun with this homage to Grant Brisbee at SBNation and his off-beat "Power Rankings".
So I bring you the MLB "BiZarre" Team Rankings based upon SBNation Blog Names
I'm looking here for asthetics, creativity and common sense and and I'll throw in the Blog Banner Icon as well for added interest. Counting down from 30 - 1 with comments after the jump and no offense meant to posters from these blogs - all in good fun.
Note: These rankings are non impartial and fully biased
UPDATE: Due to more information on "Bless You Boys"! Tigers move from #30 to #21
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30. St. Louis Cardinals: "Viva El Birdos". Comments: Welcome to #30! I was initially intruiged. Is "Birdos" spanish for "birds"? Then I found out its actually "Pajaros". So a blog name using Spanglish that if it could be translated would read "Alive the Birds". I was hoping for more from one of the most avid Baseball fan bases. Icon: Angry looking cardinal (do cardinals get angry?) that looks like a middle-schooler drew it.
29. Washington Nationals: "Federal Baseball". Comments: Never mix baseball with politics I always say. Federal Baseball sounds like the government taking over my beloved sport - Bleh. I get excited about Capitol Hill about as much as I get excited about working on Mondays. This site screams take-over, I mean just look at the Icon: Capitol Hill looming in CF and ready for a complete annhilation of what you hold dear. Don't expect to many base hits to fall in. Oh and some statue is pitching with an absurdly illegal mound height.
28. Baltimore Orioles: "Camden Chat". Comments: Boredom Award! Ok lets take your stadium name - cool, I can go with that and then add the word "Chat" maybe because it starts with same letter? Chat just seems so old. "Let's have a chat" "Look at that girl, I'm going to go over and chat her up". This is baseball - we don't chat, we argue, pontificate, scream and villify. Chat just screams - "I'm not really into this". Icon: Decent Icon here with large Oriole head in from of Camden Yards and nice font usage.
27. Los Angeles Dodgers: "True Blue LA". Comments: Sounds like a reality show or cop drama more than a Baseball Blog. I would have given more points for just "True Blue", why the need to add the LA at the end? Wait - maybe it IS a show, you know like CSI, Spinoffs to follow: Coming Soon - "True Blue Alburqurque". Icon: Even the icon looks like a TV show promo!, Sunset behind the Palms, Block Blue lettering and an odd baseball stadium ruining the front.
26. Texas Rangers: "Lone Star Ball". Comments: Huge Space Balls fan, so I was excited to see "Lone Star" plus it does fit the state, then comes the crusher "Ball". Way to kill the momentum, I mean just read it slowly Lone Star - yes!, yes! - Ball - no! Wait this could be a dance! you know one of those fashionable events that you wish you were invited to and never were. You are cordially invited to the "Lone Star Ball" (Stetson hats and Cowboy Bots required). Icon: Like it - Wild West appeal with Sheriff's Star/Baseball affixed ontop of Texas state outline and Wild West Font.
25. Pittsburgh Pirates: "Bucs Dugout". Comments: Not bad but *yawn* not very exciting. So boring in fact, that I can't think of anything to say so I'll just talk about the Icon: Very Cool!, but then again - I like pirates, Pirate Movies, dressing up like a pirate, talking parrots the like. Cool looking pirate ship on a red sea with piratey font. color scheme doesn't really match the site, but nitpicking here.
24. Milwaukee Brewers: "Brew Crew Ball". Comments: Well I just lambasted Texas for using the "Ball" suffix so why is Milwaukee a while two spots better you ask? - Beer. I like beer and that in itself earns 2 slots in my book. Plus I'd much rather attend the "Brew Crew Ball" than the "Lone Star Ball" if I had my druthers. Icon: The icon places Beer in an almost heavenly light (which I agree with) yet its a bit sketchy.
23. Chicago Cubs: "Bleed Cubbie Blue". Comments: Going to piss of some rabid Cub fans with this ranking but - who cares. Cubbie? I know - Chicago fans go around all the time saying "Cubbies". So you take an already juvenille bear and ake it seem even more juvenille sounding. Icon: Ok Wrigley brick wall - check, Ivy - check, words that looked like someone spray-painted the venerable wall - check. Wait why aren't the words "cubbie blue"?
22. Florida Marlins: "Fish Stripes" Comments: I kinda like it, then I don't, then I do, then I don't - this indecision leads me to place the fish at #21. Points for going for something unlike the next group of sites (The Rhymers), lack of points for what doesn't really flow well at all - "Fish Stripes". How about "Fish Guts"? Icon: Nice with Marlin jumping out of a hole in a Micrsoft Power Point background.
21. Detroit Tigers: "Bless You Boys". Comments: Ok, so if I were asked to visit a Blog called "Bless You Boys" without any prior knowledge here would be my first thoughts: Christian Boy Band. After some insider information, I have come to understand that this comes from Ernie Harwell, who is a legend. Still don't like it overall as a Blog Title choice, but I respect Mr. Harwell. (Thus the 9 spot jump) Icon: Detroit lettering of "Bless You Boys" with a Tiger who got unlucky enough to be close to an exploding can of blue paint.
20. Oakland A's: "Athletics Nation" Comments: Wait a minute - "Nation". In my book you need to have a global fan-base to use the word "Nation" and the A's can't even manage to fill their own stadium - points off! which is a shame because the Icon: Is pretty sweet, Green North America cut-out over a golden baseball with the aproximate location of Oakland starred against a green background - I like it.
19. Cincinnati Reds: "Red Reporter" Comments: Ok, obviously about the Reds and reporting but a little bland/obvious dontcha think? Good for a news site but a baseball blog with pasionate fans? Icon: CGI Reporter who needs a shave with a piece of paper stuck in his fedora, looks like it came right out of a Comic Book, Nice!
18. Kansas City Royals: "Royal Review" Comments: Good - has a ring to it, flows nicely off of the tongue. Review beats Reporter in my book - by one point. Icon: Ok, crowned ball with a bat...bit jumbly/cartoonish
17. Cleveland Indians: "Let's Go Tribe" Comments: Kudos for not going the Rhyming route, but a chant that doesn't really pack a punch. Can't really say much more as I'm just not into it - "Let's go BZ". Icon: Native-fest! I stared at it awhile hoping for one of those hidden images to pop out.
16. Tampa Bay Rays: "DRaysBay" Comments: Your team moves on from the Devil and yet you must still pay homage with a "D", of course DRaysBay sounds a lot better than RaysBay. Spacing where are you? Icon: I'm not a fan of TLAs (Three Letter Acronyms) but I'm a bit intruiged. Still looks like the promo for the Medical Show "Dr. B".
15. San Diego Padres: "Gaslamp Ball" Comments: Again with the "Ball" and I'm guessing there is some significance to the Gaslamps that I'm unaware of. Again sounds like a fancy dance and while the "Gas Lamp Ball" sounds intruiging, I'm still choosing the "Brew Crew Ball" Icon: Very cool
14. Houston Astros: "The Crawfish Boxes" Comments: I truly want to like this more as I'm sure there is some Houston'ish meaning I'm missing here. But since its not obviously about baseball, this is as far as I can move them up which is a shame because of the Icon: Very cool, no baseball stuff here but a crawfish, which I enjoy eating and a cool layout.
13. Toronto Blue Jays: "Bluebird Banter" Comments: So basically the Orioles and Blue Jays sites say basically the same thing yet one is ranked at 27 and the other at 14. That's how much I like "Banter" over "Chat" Banter just sounds like something is happening. Plus Bluebird Banter just rolls off the tongue. Icon: Colorful Blue Jay in front of the Maple Leaf - very classy.
12. Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim: "Halos Heaven" Comments: Fits nicely, Halos, Heaven - works on both a first-letter and logical level. Icon: Ok, a bit video-gamish but works.
11. New York Yankees: "Pinstripe Alley" Comments: Yanks fans - sorry - this is a biased post and I could not bring myslef to allow you into the top ten. That said - Pinstripe Alley is a solid, if not spectacular entry in to the Blog Name community and you should be proud. Wait you are already proud so moving along Icon: Bridge above a James Bond like eye viewing the Empire State Building - Classy.
10. Philadelphia Phillies: "The Good Phight" Comments: I see where you are going with this - Remove the F and replace with PH - clever. Works on many levels, which gets you in the top ten - barely Icon: Fonts are pretty good and I get the Liberty Bell. Thrown off a bit by the white boxer outline, but on the whole nice.
9. Colorado Rockies: "Purple Row" Comments: Lot to like here. Purple is my favorite color and there are rows of purple seats at Rockie Stadium. Kinda makes you feel you are at the stadium and jawing with your buds seated in the purple row. Icon: One of my favs - baseball coming in from ther Rockies over the purple row of seats and cool lettering.
8. Chicago White Sox: "South Side Sox" Comments: Kudos on the triple-first-letter feat! You just scored 3 points in Scategories! Icon: Like it - Very artistic - almost like the intro into a documentary film.
T6. New York Mets: "Amazin' Avenue" Comments: Our first tie! I like things that make me think of music and I like music. Props to the Mets for making me sing Eddy Grants "Electric Avenue" every time I look at the site. "We gonna rick down to - Amazin' Avenue - and then we'll take it higher!" Works on all levels: first letter score, I like "Avenue" because it feels very street, like you're hanging out with your buds drinking beers on Friday night. Icon: Blah, City outline with some cursive fonting in front - pretty boring
T6. Minnesota Twins: "Twinkie Town" Comments: "Wont you take me to - Twinkie Town!". Food points earns it one more point that the Mets - Twinkies - yum!. Icon: Baseball lying in the grass like someone drove it right out of the city.
5. Seattle Mariners: "Lookout Landing" Comments: Used to live in Seattle and attended numerous games at Safeco, Dave Cameron, etc. = points. Icon: Misery and a bar, very baseballish although fuzzy.
4. San Francisco Giants: "McCovey Chronicles" Comments: Classy homage to one of the most beloved players in the club's history. He's got a cove, now he has a Blog. Icon: The classiness continues with this simple yet elegant entry. Baseball floating in the couds in front of S.F. Colorful block lettering above. McCovery smiling from heaven.
3. Atlanta Braves: "Talking Chop" Comments: Let's see - we've got a pun that fits both the team's schtic and fits as a Blogging site. Bingo! Plus its my dad's favorite team which earns it many points. Icon: Tomahawk fits but its a little childish, Cursive block lettering with a glow!
2. Arizona Diamondbacks: "AZ Snake Pit" Comments: Almost perfect! "The Snake Pit" would have pushed for a number one ranking. The AZ throws it off a bit and is unnecessary. Icon: Cool looking diamondback about to strike! Watch-out! Nice lettering.
and the winner is
1. Boston Red Sox: "Over the Monster" Comments: Clearly the best. Let's see we got the iconic field element, and a homage to the homerrun being hit over the iconic field element. Unmistakable yet simple and unlike other sites lends itself to and easy-to-use short-hand TLA of "OTM". Icon: Iconic
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Comments
I would have put GLB in the top 10 on their icon alone. I think it's the best one on SBN.
DFA Rev Halofan
I'm a 7 WAR player in bed.
Official Baker of Red Sox Nation
Fear the Roar.
The Gaslamp District is one of the trendy bar scenes of San Diego.
I think the new stadium (which is in my top five of the 25+ parks I’ve visited) is actually in the Gaslamp District, hence the reference you missed. (Doesn’t defend “Gaslamp Ball” but explaining the Gaslamp reference itself.)
To me Petco is #2 behind Fenway.
and I’ve been to quite a few parks.
DFA Rev Halofan
I'm a 7 WAR player in bed.
Official Baker of Red Sox Nation
Fear the Roar.
by TheLoneDavid on May 17, 2011 11:26 PM EDT up reply actions
Love that park.
I’m only a couple hours away, gotta find a way to get there this summer.
"We are not normal, We are Legends. People will tell their kids about us." - Deon Butler before Ohio State Game 2008.
The Sox play there
You should try to head over. I’m going to try to get over there myself, if it works out right.
I've been to
Fenway, Old Yankee Stadium, Tiger Stadium, Comerica Park, Miller Park, Target Field, Wrigley Field, US Cellular Field, Busch Stadium, Chase Stadium, AT&T Park, Nationals Park, and Petco.
DFA Rev Halofan
I'm a 7 WAR player in bed.
Official Baker of Red Sox Nation
Fear the Roar.
by TheLoneDavid on May 18, 2011 1:24 AM EDT up reply actions
New
DFA Rev Halofan
I'm a 7 WAR player in bed.
Official Baker of Red Sox Nation
Fear the Roar.
by TheLoneDavid on May 18, 2011 11:36 PM EDT up reply actions
I've got Fenway and Wrigley #1 and #2.
And we’ve discussed how much you hate Wrigley (along with a bunch of other folks around here)… I guess I’m just a sucker for the history.
I’d put PNC #3 because it is such a beautiful view of the city in the late afternoon/early evening and a beautiful ballpark too. I love the warehouse in Petco that juts into the field, so I’d probably put it #4 very closely behind PNC.
#5? Well, the dome in Tampa, of course! (I KID, I KID!!) Hmmm… let me think for a moment… what ballpark am I overlooking in my Top 5?
Love Jacobs Field, in large part because there’s a cheap Holiday Inn Express in a historic old building – nice big rooms – walking distance to the stadium and a lot of the local bars; Safeco has some great food and the landing out in CF is a great place to watch the game and the local talent; Camden and the Ballpark at Arlington are the original HOKs, and I’d give the nod to Camden for the warehouse backdrop in right-center. PacBell (or whatever it is now) never really did that much for me (hate the neon glove in LF, even if McCovey’s Cove is a cool feature; ditto Atlanta’s Turner Field with their big Coke bottle; Anaheim, the White Sox and Kansas City tried to update their old parks, and made good improvements, but not enough; I actually like Chavez Ravine – Dodger Stadium, despite it’s age… just feels like a great old ball park. Miller Park is cool, but starts to feel like one of the HOK cookie cutter parks in Detroit, Cincinnati, Arizona and Houston… Tampa and Florida’s were among the worst I ever visited. Toronto and Oaklands cylinders were better than them… but… that’s not saying much. I thought the old Yankee Stadium was a cesspool, but still better than the New Mordor they’ve built now.
I went to the old Philly and St. Louis, but not the new ones, so cannot comment there. Never made either park in Minnesota or for the Mets, so ditto. Missing the Nationals ballpark as well.
What’s left? You know… I made my first trip to Coors Field last year, and I have to say I really liked it. I guess that’d be my #5.
Depending on if you count old stadiums
My list goes either Fenway, Petco, Tiger, Miller, Chase or Fenway, Petco, Miller, Chase, Busch.
I only went to old Tiger Stadium when I was a kid, which might color my experience of it, but I felt it had a lot more personality than any other park I’ve been to other than Petco and Fenway.
DFA Rev Halofan
I'm a 7 WAR player in bed.
Official Baker of Red Sox Nation
Fear the Roar.
by TheLoneDavid on May 18, 2011 11:40 PM EDT up reply actions
Yeah, I missed that one.
Like I said above: I got a few of the old parks (Cinergy Field and the Great American Ballpark in Cincy is one where I’ve been to both), but I missed Tiger Stadium.
I think that’s one I would have liked, with all the history. So cannot fault your decision there. You really should check out PNC though… such a beautiful ballpark, and with the Sox playing there this year, it’s a good excuse to go.
Trying to convince the wife into a summer trip to every ballpark
once the kid has graduated
I’ve got like 12 years to plan and I suppose thar there’ll be a few new ones by then, but a man can drean
I have a buddy of mine that did it every season for about 5 years.
He worked for Dodgers Radio, so he did a broadcast from all the different parks (and then they sort of spun it off into some guys that did it as a roadtrip). He got interviewed by a lot of the broadcast teams in different cities too.
He also goes to the All Star game, and the World Series every year. Helps when you’ve got some ridiculous connections on the tickets.
When I lived in Cincinnati, a buddy of mine went with me to parks around the area – Chicago, Detroit, St. Louis, Pittsburgh, etc. and others out of the area. We would log about 15 ballparks a season. We’ve talked about doing the ballpark tour ourselves for our 50th/60th birthdays, or something like that. (Damn… I’ve got about the same time to plan that as you do…)
My current annual tally? Let’s just say, I’m happy I get back to Fenway once a season, every season, since I moved here in 2005. Still trying to work out the trip for 2011, but thinking probably September or early in October… so tempted to gamble on a playoff game just so I can check out the fall foliage in New England (which I haven’t seen since I left the mainland).
Though... 2010 was a good year.
I got 4 ballparks last summer (Coors and Fenway as big bonuses… first trip to Coors – and Tampa and Florida as “checked them off my list – hope I never go back to either”).
The new Marlins park being built soon also means the trip to Florida was entirely worthless. Really… I wish I’d never even gone. Once the new one is built, I’ll need to go to that one anyway.
Yeah, it was Ernie Harwell's thing.
DFA Rev Halofan
I'm a 7 WAR player in bed.
Official Baker of Red Sox Nation
Fear the Roar.
by TheLoneDavid on May 17, 2011 2:21 PM EDT up reply actions
Must apologize to my Tiger friends
for not knowing “Bless You Boys”. Harwell just rolled over in his grave
This moves them up in the rankings right?
DFA Rev Halofan
I'm a 7 WAR player in bed.
Official Baker of Red Sox Nation
Fear the Roar.
by TheLoneDavid on May 17, 2011 2:51 PM EDT up reply actions
I also want to point out that the Tiger in BYB is looking through a window in the shape of the state of Michigan.
DFA Rev Halofan
I'm a 7 WAR player in bed.
Official Baker of Red Sox Nation
Fear the Roar.
by TheLoneDavid on May 17, 2011 3:07 PM EDT up reply actions
I was initially going to do this as if the Blog were like bar names
Like would you go to a bar called “Royal Review”…….
Then I totally get why you don't like the "ball" names
they sound like gay nightclubs. Nothing wrong with it, just not where I want to go to drink and watch baseball.
DFA Rev Halofan
I'm a 7 WAR player in bed.
Official Baker of Red Sox Nation
Fear the Roar.
by TheLoneDavid on May 17, 2011 2:52 PM EDT up reply actions
I read DRaysBay
reasonably frequently, for obvious reasons. They have some really good statistical analysis. This morning there is a piece on catching (warning, avert your eyes Salty supporters).
The comments are a pretty nasty, though.
Bloggy's Thoughts:
LA Dodgers: Really? You couldn’t come up with something creative with the word “Dodger”? I mean, I’M sure ’DodgeBall" is in use somewhere out in the blogosphere, but still. I agree. True Blue LA does sound like Sipowitz got transfered to South Central.
Pirates: So much stuff you could do with this. Swashbuckers, Privateers, Walking the plank, prepare to be boarded…c’mon. There has to be something better than “Buc’s Dugout”. Treasure chest? X marks the spot? Buried treasure? Anything? Pirates should be lower due to wealth of material to work with. Arguably last.
Brewers: Yeah…I like beer, too.
Cubs: LOWER. “Bleed Cubbie Blue” is just plain lame. You’ve got bears, bricks, and vines and over a hundred years of history. Get yer shit together. Fight with the Pirates for last.
Oakland: “Athlete’s Foot”? Okay, maybe not…
Let’s Go Tribe: Fuh. Whatever.
Tampa:
Your team moves on from the Devil and yet you must still pay homage with a “D”, of course DRaysBay sounds a lot better than RaysBay.
Of course “Devil Rays” sounds better than “Rays”. Tam-pa Bay De-vil Rays. If it was just Tampa, then fine. The Tampa Rays. But it’s not. It’s Tampa Bay. You need more syllables to balance it out. You can refer to yourself as the Rays if ya want…we all do. Just like we call Toronto “the Jays”. But they’re still the Blue Jays. You’re still the freakin’ Devil Rays as far as I’m concerned.
Speaking of the Jays, Bluebird Banter should be much higher. So should Gaslamp Ball. Good freakin’ names. And let’s be honest with ourselves. “Pinstripe Alley” is a freakin’ kickass name for a blog. It really is. But, since yer the MFY, you sit at 11 on basic principle.
Other than that, I really don’t like the name “Amazing Avenue”…how about “How Metropolitan”?? A “row” is another term for a fight, so I like the name “Purple Row” moreso for that reason.
“South Side Sox” is as close to perfection as there is in SBNation baseball, as far as I’m concerned. Plays on the entire North Side/South Side dynamic of Chicagofantastic alliteration, and wonderful phonics with the single syllables. In fact, I’ve always been annoyed by the White Sox being called the ChiSox to Boston’s BoSox. They should be called the South Side Sox in these cases.
Over The Monster: WE RULE!!
And, for the record, “Viva El Birdos” cracks me up.
Galactus does as he pleases. Because Galactus is drunk.
@#$%ing Twit: @blogtard
Upon further review and a chance to read my own work
I think both Purple Row and SSS should move ahead of Amazin Avenue and Twinkie Town….just got caught up in the music moment
Understandable.
The rhythm is gonna getcha.
Galactus does as he pleases. Because Galactus is drunk.
@#$%ing Twit: @blogtard
By the way, now that I'm over myself a bit
Great post. Lotsa fun. Enjoyed the “ball = dance” running joke thoroughly (even though I don’t mind it being in the name of a blog at all).
Also, whenever I see “DRayBay”, I think “D-Bag Bay”…which works.
Also, also…I wish I hadda used some more bold in there. Would have made it easier to read.
Galactus does as he pleases. Because Galactus is drunk.
@#$%ing Twit: @blogtard
by Bloggy on May 18, 2011 3:21 PM EDT reply actions 1 recs
My original idea was to go with the sites as "Bar Names"
Because I kind like the idea that I’m hanging at a bar with my mates when visiting OTM
in that Realm the rankings might have been different
I could revisit my stadium rankings based on the nightlife around them.
Still end up with Fenway Park at the top of that list, both for the bars immediately around Fenway, but also for the ones that are in close proximity (walking distance) as well.
I'm going to use my talents to fix the broken names, 30-16.
Viva El Birdos → Gateway Gathering Moving from a spanglish name to a name promoting community that plays off of the one memorable feature of St Louis architecture has to earn the Cards some points.
Federal Baseball → Presidential Pitching The Nationals are in an unfortunate position here. The only regional feature of DC is that it’s the seat of the government, and their park lacks any recognizable features. Naming opportunities are few and far between.
Camden Chat → Camden Nesting Grounds We’ll keep the name of your stadium, but instead of taking an old fashioned word for talking, let’s play off of your team mascot, a bird. This is a place where you can come to rest and talk with other Orioles fans.
True Blue LA → Dodgertown Redux Evoke nostalgia and remind all your fans about the most famous Spring Training facility in history.
Lone Star Ball → Ranger Station Simple enough, and it keeps the Texas feeling alive without making us think of dance halls.
Bucs Dugout → The Dead Man’s Chest Long John Silver is perhaps the most iconic pirate of all time. What better way to celebrate the pirate mascot than to use his book as inspiration for your blog?
Brew Crew Ball → The Brewery Once again, simple, while keeping the spirit of the team around.
Bleed Cubbie Blue → Still Waiting in Wrigley If they ever do win it all they’ll have to change it, but a century long waiting streak has to be acknowledged.
Fish Stripes → Fish n’ Chips A lot like the Nationals, so unremarkable that it’s hard to come up with a name for them. At least this one comes with newspaper.
Bless You Boys → Harwell’s Heroes Is using Ernie’s catch phrase as your name won’t bring BZ’s approval, then maybe using his name will.
Athletic’s Nation → Straight A’s Icon: A report card stamped with the green and gold A.
Reds Reporter → Cincinatti Assembly Line Putting the Big Red Machine together…
Royals Review → The Royal We Showing themselves as a collective.
Let’s Go Tribe → Word on the Reservation Again, I’m playing off the mascot.
DRaysBay → Tampa’s Tidepool Shrug I’m not gonna try too hard for the Rays.
DFA Rev Halofan
I'm a 7 WAR player in bed.
Official Baker of Red Sox Nation
Fear the Roar.
Approval.
“Straight A’s” and “The Royal We” are fantastic. Dead Man’s Chest could be called “DMC”, getting you a sweet little TLA like OTM.
Galactus does as he pleases. Because Galactus is drunk.
@#$%ing Twit: @blogtard
Props for Dead Man's Chest!
That would be utterly sweet. The 4 Pirates fans could be proud of that one
Do the rankings change now that we have a new logo?
I like to think we are so awesome, we could have a picture of godzilla in a tutu hanging out next to the eiffel tower and still be number 1
The Red Sox suck, and I am the dirt that was sucked in, I am a dirty.
I think this is an accurate and unbiased assessment.
Galactus does as he pleases. Because Galactus is drunk.
@#$%ing Twit: @blogtard



























