by Jim Prisching - AP

Thanks for not doing this, Gonzo.

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First things first - thanks to Bloggy for the new name idea. And now, as payment:

Red Sox Likely To Watch Alex Gonzalez Walk, Jason Varitek Return - NESN.com

These should probably be flipped. As much as I love Jed, no one is 100% certain that he can come back (more on this is a second), even as a lesser player than we would expect. Gonzo somehow managed to destroy all rational predictions and give the Sox several runs of production above replacement. He was able to stretch what appeared to be normal variation into a relatively high level of play, something we could not have expected when we resorted to trading for him.

There's no one else really available that can provide the safety net that Gonzo can, so I can't see a reason why the Front Office doesn't try to resign him, albeit without the option (unless that vested without my noticing or something).

The other part of this story is that Tek is supposed to be coming back - well, I have some bad news:

2009 Catcher Defense: Filling in the Holes (yet again) - Driveline Mechanics

A certain catcher is WAY down on that list. Vic is managing to break roughly even, but that would likely not be the case if he was asked to catch too often. Now, for more bad news:

Jed Lowrie: Wait ’til next year - BostonHerald.com

"It really depends on what the doctor says," Lowrie said. "I don’t know what the surgery would be if there were to be one, but I guess it’s not out of the question."

Time to defend'em: Of course it's possible - it's also possible that every single player on the Sox catches swine flu, drinks gallons of tequila in some Paps-led attempt to flush their system, and puke all over the floor of the clubhouse, killing an ant that managed to find it's way in. See, Jed? THAT's what you're supposed to say - oh, and bring one of those Neurolyzers to wipe their memory if they start writing anything down. Can't trust the media anymore, kid.

After the jump, we get slightly less random and look at next year. Not much else to do now anyways.

Shades of 2006 coming should scare Red Sox fans - Red Sox Monster

NG, keep your hands where we can see them. Also, I propose a game: everytime NG mentions "2006" this offseason, we have to quote a movie; which is up to you. Should be interesting.

David Mamet and Surviving Grady Present: Glengarry Glen Sox

It'd be funnier if it was right - like, not using 3 games to determine if we should resign Bay - but it's still pretty funny.

Lowrie has something to prove - The Boston Globe

Theo lays down the law on Dice-K - Extra Bases

"We want him to have a really productive offseason and come into camp in the best possible shape," Epstein said. "We can notice right away that he’s had a strong offseason of workouts. And then also with his shoulder. That he does the shoulder program to an extent that he’s ready to go out and throw 200-plus innings. Those are things he didn’t accomplish last year.

Wagner’s agent doubts talk of retirement - Clubhouse Insider

"Those comments probably came right after the Red Sox lost, so I’d bet they were said in the heat of the moment, when he was very frustrated," said Stringfellow a few minutes ago over the phone. "That’s probably not the best time to take comments like that as gospel."

Red Sox contracts - BostonHerald.com

Sox’ Expiring Contracts - Fire Brand of the American League

In case some of you hadn't discovered Cot's yet, or choose not to refer to them - weirdos.

Steve Phillips: Red Sox Should Trade Jonathan Papelbon - NESN.com

Damn, it just got a whole lot harder to argue for trading him.

I still LIKE Jonathan Papelbon. There. I said it. - Fenway West

Spike TV Names Red Sox Fans #3 Most Annoying Fans In Sports - Masshole Sports

Dane Cook =/= funny. And I promise, there's no reason I put these last three links together.

Anything that we missed ("got through the Filter"? Ooh...) or you want to share? We accept all major brands of links here. Or, you can write out a comment. Ya know - your choice.